Thriving in relationships
In our relationships, we often seek closeness, love, warmth, support, trust, and being able to lean in and be confident in their relationship. We see the best in each other and the best of us can unfold and all that is possible. If we are in a couple relationship, it is absolutely central to our common well-being that it works well. And that we can repair it when something has gone awry.
Challenges and development in relationships
The couple relationship is where we often get the greatest development gift. We are confronted with our greatest development potential. It’s quite common to have challenges in relationships – everyone has them and it’s ok.
- You may find it difficult to obtain the deep confidential contact with my partner that you wish.
- Maybe you don’t feel heard.
- Do you wish you could learn the lesson and move on from the old patterns?
- Is it sometimes like walking on eggshells
- Having trouble positioning yourself on the same page as your partner and getting in touch?
- Do you doubt the relationship can be saved?
NVC Mediation – With connection we can find solutions
Nonviolent Communication helps create a special kind of connection where it becomes possible to meet the needs of both parties, so that it happens voluntarily and joyfully, and thus there can be sustainable solutions to discrepancies. The process is based on both parties taking turns to do the following:
- A listens with empathy to B until A senses connection with what is important to B. Then A expresses honestly so that B can connect with what is important to A.
- This “dance” between you and your partner’s heart is continued until both parties feel heard by the other. Then creatively look for a solution that can meet the needs of both parties. Or the solution will find us.
In my work with couples, I support both to first make connection with your own needs, and then to connect with each other. This process is also called Life Enriching Communication, Giraffe or NVC Mediation.
It is a fruitful process that you can learn to use at home, and it can be helpful to have a third person in place to support you in hearing each other when there are high-tension topics you are talking about.
This is one of several processes we can work on to create change by looking at:
- limiting patterns and beliefs
- default modes of reaction
To get the most out of our collaboration, you can take these tools home. You get to apply the learning into everyday situations by practicing dialogue with needs awareness, etc.